Monday, March 16, 2020

Police ask public to stop calling 911 over lack of toilet paper...

Police are trained to respond to all kinds of emergencies, but this is a new one.
One police department in Oregon posted a reminder on their Facebook page, asking the public to not call for an emergency if they run out of toilet paper due to the coronavirus outbreak.
The post then pointed out the different methods used throughout history before suggesting other items that could be used in lieu of "your favorite soft, ultra plush two-ply citrus scented tissue."
Among their suggestions: grocery store receipts, newspaper, cloth rags, magazine pages, cotton balls and even leaves.
"Be resourceful. Be patient. There is a TP shortage. This too shall pass. Just don’t call 9-1-1. We cannot bring you toilet paper," the post concluded.
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3 comments:

Yoeli said...

Mistumme Tzionim geven

Koychee vOytzem Vet Vipee

Ezra the Kapo said...

I've just been hired as PR rep for Charmin.

I think so called "hoarders" are misunderstood. Chuchmo baGoyim taamin. And azoy vee zei zuggin in der velt: When you gotta go, you gotta go!

KJ Putz writing letter to editor of Der Yid said...

Chassidishe bucherim & yingerleit darfen feeren zich vee Chassidishe bucherim & yingerleit. Zei vus vipen der tuchess chitz fin arvei Shabussos veYumim Toyvim feeren vee goyim.