Monday, December 20, 2021

It’s hard to believe Biden never talked with Harris about 2024


On its face, the claim by Vice President Kamala Harris that she and President Biden have never discussed whether he would seek re-election seems the kind of ridiculous lie that only a politician would tell. With Biden’s growing age and declining faculties, and their party’s troubled state, not to mention Harris’ staff problems and low standing with voters, it is impossible to believe the president and vice president have never talked about 2024

And given the stakes for the country, they would be guilty of negligence not to talk about the future. Surely it came up at some point?

Nope, not once, insisted Harris. She told The Wall Street Journal in response to a question about 2024, “I’ll be very honest: I don’t think about it, nor have we talked about it.”

So we are to believe that not only have they not talked about the next election, she hasn’t even thought about it. That would make her almost unique in the United States! 

Harris says all this while declaring she is being “very honest,” which, naturally makes the claim even less believable. But that’s her story and she’s sticking to it. 

So, in the absence of hard evidence to the contrary and in the spirit of the holiday season, let’s be kind and generous. Perhaps there is a chance, a very technical, narrow chance, that Harris was guilty of engaging in extreme political spin but not of telling an outright lie. 

In that case, here’s a possible scenario that comes to mind.

Imagine it’s late Friday afternoon and she and the president are alone in the Oval Office after a rough week, meaning it could have been almost any Friday this year. Nothing is going well, they’re tired and frustrated and she looks at him and says, “Joe, we have to talk.”

He blinks his eyes as he wonders who she is and is about to ask how she got into the building when he remembers she’s his vice president. But he doesn’t like her tone and clenches both fists as he assumes she wants his job.

His eyes narrow to tiny slits and he says to her: “Look, kid, here’s the deal. You haven’t got it. So back off.”

She’s shocked at his reaction. She only wanted to talk about getting their polls up so the midterms wouldn’t cost them Congress. Instead he cuts her to the core with an insult.

She does what she always does when she’s nervous — laughs loudly. He ignores her and turns his back to walk away — and suddenly she is on fire with fury. 

“I haven’t got it? I haven’t got it?” she practically screams. “You doddering old dimwitted fool, you’re wrecking the country and killing the party. 

“P“And you say I haven’t got it? How dare you!”

Now it’s Biden’s turn to be shocked. He wheels around and instead of taking a step, stumbles toward her. Afraid he’s going to fall, she catches him by putting both hands on his chest and steadies him. 

“Who are you calling old?” he demands. “I’m 69. Feel these muscles,” he shouts, flexing his biceps.

“And don’t give me that Carter crap. And so what if Obama doesn’t like me. What did he ever do for me?” People are saying you’re the worst president ever, worse than Carter. You can’t even read a teleprompter without veering into gibberish. You keep telling that same stupid story about the Amtrak conductor, which everybody knows isn’t true. Even Obama’s fed up and thinks you’re hopeless. 

She can’t believe her ears and lets him have it again. 

“What did Obama ever do for you? He made you vice president, that’s what. Without him, you’d be in Delaware eating Jell-O and taking long naps. And there wouldn’t be any reporters around to care what damn flavor of ice cream you like. 

“In fact, you might not be able to afford ice cream. You wouldn’t have a job and your brilliant son Hunter wouldn’t have any income because nobody would pay him off to get to you.” 

She moves toward him, her prosecutor experience kicking in. “And tell me, who in the world is buying that crap he calls art?”

“And one more thing, you old goat, you’re 79, not 69!” 

Now he’s shouting, too. “What a cheap shot. Anybody can forget how old they are!”

Suddenly, he seems worn out. He lowers his voice and says matter of factly: “Look, here’s the deal. You’re no help. I gave you the job and lots to do. You said you would fix the border but you won’t even go there. What do you do all day?

“Nobody wants to work for you and even our media friends don’t like you. Do you know how terrible you have to be not to get a puff piece in the New York Times? 

“You’re the first female vice president, you’re black, you’re way out there on the left, all the things they want. But still the Times won’t say anything nice about you.”

At that moment, Jill Biden walks in and shushes them. She takes her husband by the arm and leads him out the door toward the residence. As they walk down the hall, Harris hears the first lady tell the president he can have sprinkles on his chocolate ice cream tonight.

There you have it — a scenario that makes it possible to believe Biden and Harris never actually talked about 2024. After their disastrous year together, there’s nothing left to say.

1 comment:

galicianer said...

Not hard too believe at all. He doesn't know what year it is.