Rav Yitzchak Berkovits on Chaim Walder: ‘Narcissist and a Sociopath'

 

Rav Yitchak Berkovits, one of the preeminent and most respected American poskim in Israel, conducted a Zoom video call with therapists and mental health professionals in the aftermath of the Chaim Walder matter.

He discussed multiple lessons and takeaways from this challenging episode, and clarified the position of the Gedolim in this complex matter.

Rav Berkovits essentially said that any doubts that one may have had about the allegations were erased by Walder himself.

He said, “What made things very clear was the suicide note. This was not a depressed person writing a note. This was narcissism at its best, this was manipulative, this was a person preparing to commit a violent crime, murder, and the victims…all of us, [he intended that] we should all feel guilty for his death. I think to any level headed human being who has any sensitivity to human beings and a bit of nuance–it’s obvious.”

He added, “We are dealing with a sociopath, who knows how many victims we don’t know about, who knows how many lives were destroyed.”

The Rav said that he does not know why this was not handled by the conventional Bais Din protocol. He was not critical of anyone involved, however he said that victims generally do not need to face perpetrators in Bais Din, and that many Batei Din have dealt with these issues extremely effectively.

He also said that while not every complaint is substantiated, that is usually the exception and not the rule.

In addition, the Rav said that he highly doubts the claim that “nobody wanted to touch this case”, because many cases like this have been properly handled in Bais Din and predators have been punished and prevented from acting further.

He said that “Rav Shmuel Eliyahu has a heart of gold, and when he heard from victims, that was certainly not something that he could live with.”

Rav Berkovits was adamant that males should never counsel females. He told the professionals that “the number one takeaway is that there is no heter for a male to counsel a female, whether as a therapist, counselor, or coach…seminaries where young charismatic good looking men teach women, we have had too many problems, there is something sick with that.”

The Rav said there “are plenty of competent professional women and there is no reason or justification for a woman to ever visit a man.”

He said “in theory it should all be professional, however l’maaseh it is not that way.”

Rav Berkovits is Rosh Kollel in the renowned Jerusalem Kollel. He is recognized world-wide as a prominent posek and ba’al eitzah. Through his varied roles in the kiruv world, he has become a sought after speaker and his advice on complex community matters is valued by Rabbonim and leaders across the globe.

An Open Letter from an Abuse Survivor

 

Dear random anonymous person on the internet,

What if it were your daughter? Your sister? Your brother? Your best friend?

Would you still be out here screaming Lashon Hora? Innocent until proven guilty?

If you answered in the affirmative, you can stop reading now. You’re not my target audience. I’m looking for those who can actually stop defending for a second and just…..listen.

Because we really really need you to listen to us.

Rebbetzin Riki's Dvar Torah in Yiddish

 

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A post shared by Riki Rose (@riki_rose)

In a Stunning Reversal Walder’s Own Lawyer Backtracks and Apologizes to Haaretz Reporter

 

In a stunning turnaround, Dovi Weinroth, Chaim Walder’s lawyer and personal confidant, appears to have backtracked from his role as an apologist of Walder’s.

In addition, Mr. Weinroth apologized to the Haaretz reporter who first broke the story, after calling him a murderer at Walder’s hesped.

On Thursday Mr. Weinroth published an emotional and candid Facebook post, in which he discussed the importance of focusing on the unspeakable pain and torture that the victims suffered. He also expressed remorse for his own words at Walder’s levaya.

He wrote, “I write post-trauma. Like everyone else, I have been going through a very difficult personal upheaval since Chaim Walder’s suicide. This story is a kind of horror film. It is never too late to hear the sound of those who were shattered.”

He also addressed his apology to the reporter, saying, “I picked up the phone and called Aharon Rabinovitch. Truthfully this was the first time, and for a simple reason. To apologize. At the end of the day I never spoke with him. [Yet] I got up at the levaya and demeaned him.”

He wrote about Mr. Rabinovitch’s gracious and forgiving response. “Dovi I’m not upset at you. You were eulogizing a friend. I can understand that. Of course I disagree with you and think you did not convey the right message. You missed the most important point, but I did not take it as an attack. Do not worry one bit.” .

Mr. Weinroth went further, saying that the extreme concern to avoid lashon hara may have led to a lack of concern about the victims.

He wrote, “I understand that the most dangerous part of this has been the lectures against lashon hara, for one simple reason: The Charedi community has not offered any alternative. To frighten people about speaking lashon hara about a matter like this only worsens the situation.

“I missed [the point], and I missed it in a huge way. At the hesped, I spoke about lashon hara, and I now realize that only exacerbates the problem, if certain other prerequisites are not first met. Likewise, everyone must ask themselves, what is their motivation for their comments or publication–to repair or to gossip?”

Bais Yaakov Boro Park Sends Letter to Parents..."Talking about the Rapist Walder is Loshon Hara"

 

Let's take a break and listen to one of R' Ben-Zion Shenker's beautiful compositions

 

 

Yonassan Schvartz "Chizuk from the Parsha" Is Only Concerned About "Walder's family" not the ones he murdered and raped

 

 His "chizuk" didn't work on Walder, who he says he was in contact with every day before his cowardly act of suicide! Schwartz is upset that people are burning Walder's books... guess why?

Schwartz distributes Kids Speak books in Yiddish..

Rabbi Shraga Feivel Zimmerman Answers the "Loshon Hara-nikers" ,,, "Walder's Act Was a Staged act of Narcissism"

 

Response To Rabbi Edelstein's Fatwa that "These Matters Must Be Dealt With Confidentially"

 Rabanim had the field to themselves for 60 years, they told us NOT to go to the police, to come to them, to deal with it in secret, under the radar. The result is Yehuda Meshi Zahav, Chaim Walder, Eliezer Berland, Malka Leifer and too many others to count. all were prolific serial rapists, who were well known to Aaskanim and Rabanim.

We trusted our Rabonim and they shattered that trust, they allowed child rape to go on for years! in fact there was a vaad/ committee set up in Bnei-Barak by Rabanim where people were told to log complaints of abuse and guess whom they selected as head of this committee, none other than Chaim Walder!! Some cruel joke.

Then comes along Aaron Rabinovitch and puts an abrubt end to this Retzicha almost single handedly, he did in 2 month what all Rabonim were unable or unwilling to do for 30 years, and what do these same Rabonim say?? No no this is not the right way to do it!! come to us we will handle it in secret, under the radar…. let us handle this

This is the very definition of insanity, doing the same thing again and again and expecting different results! we have tried that for 60 years, and if we continue doing this we will unfortunately get the same results.

Sadly, going to the press is  the only option. For decades and way too often, Rabbonim have covered-up abuse and been complicit in allowing abusers to change locations. To claim that “all those” who go to the media are simply trying to cause harm is simplistic. Why is it not possible to be dan l’kaph zechus and say that many of them are trying to help by publicizing the matter in order to save the community from harm? It’s disappointing to see such a weak, ad hominem, attack being used.

The attitude of “we shouldn’t talk about such things” only works to shield the abusers and allow Rabbonim to avoid responsibility.

a) Is Rabbi Edelstein telling us it is halacha that I will have olam haba if I have an affair? Please answer yes or no
b) Is the Rov saying that a TRUSTED public CHAREIDI figure who is claimed by multiple people over many years to have violated d’oraisos that harm other chareidi yidden.should not be outed among the community ?
and most importantly,
c) Who is going to protect us in the chareidi olam from the crime, the abuse, the sham leaders and the false tzidkus that is out there if our gedolim are not going to??

NOT Speaking Loshon Hara is what destroyed the Bais Hamikdash

 From  Yudel Shain

The lessons to be learned from the fast of Tzom Gedaliah

See also:http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/342509/terrible-chillul-hashem-unfolds.html

צום  גדלי-ה

It is a fast day that commemorates a tragic time in our people’s history, one

that the Gemorah (Rosh HaShanah 18b) equates with the destruction of the Beis HaMikdash itself – a very jarring thought. And yet perhaps even more jarring, are the words of the Panim Meiros on the Yerushalmi in Horios (3:5). The Panim Meiros states as follows:  Gedaliah caused his own death.

He was, himself to blame, not only for his death but for the deaths of thousands of others.How so? 

When people erroneously forbid information from being disseminated on account of thinking that it is Lashon Horah – terrible tragedies result.  When people think that it is absolutely forbidden to pass on necessary information, people cannot take protective measures. At times this too can be quite devastating.

Gedaliah Ben Achikam was one of the Gedolei HaDor of his generation. It is a perhaps little known fact, but he was also a Navi. Indeed the Gemorah (Rosh HaShana 18b) explains that Hashem Himself (Zechariah 8:19) equates the death of this great Tzaddik with the destruction of the Bais HaMikdash!  Rarely if ever do we find such testimony as to the stature of any individual.

Hashem himself is his character witness.

Zera Shimshon Parshas Ve'era

 

ESTI HAMILTON ANSWERS HER CRITICS

 

A cry for help from a survivor

 

DIN: She wasn’t a master story teller. She didn’t have a son’s grave to die on. She didn’t have a gun to shoot herself.

She died as she lived: powerless and in silence.

She didn’t get a mass funeral. She didn’t get a prominent obituary in the newspaper.

Shifra Horovitz Z”L.

Dear random anonymous person on the internet,

What if it were your daughter? Your sister? Your brother? Your best friend?

Would you still be out here screaming Lashon Hora? Innocent until proven guilty?

If you answered in the affirmative, you can stop reading now. You’re not my target audience. I’m looking for those who can actually stop defending for a second and just…..listen.

Because we really really need you to listen to us.

I needed you to listen, weeks ago when this story broke. When I tried to make you understand that multiple victims, with therapist and family corroboration, should be enough for you to stop shouting me down with that completely misused term “innocent until proven guilty”.

Shifra Horovitz, the Walder victim who so tragically ended her life today, needed you to listen. Not to defend. Not to ignore.

For my own healing, I promised myself that I wouldn’t check to see what you were saying about the Walder saga. That I wouldn’t allow myself to be triggered by the social media outrage machine or the frum press’ role in this. My inner voice told me that was a sign of growth; that it was self-compassion to not engage with opinions that may be unkind to abuse survivors like myself.

But even I couldn’t completely block you out.

Partly because well-meaning friends still shared some of the more outrageous takes, but more so because no matter how many years you’ve been in therapy, and how many thousands of hours spent practicing self-love, there is still a part of you that feels soothed when it hears “we believe you”. That inner child, wounded to the core, forever looking for reassurance and validation. The victim who spent years being told (and internalizing) how bad they were, will never tire of hearing “it’s not your fault. You are a good person. You are not lying.”

That’s what was so powerful about the communal response to this story. It marks one of the first times that large institutions in our society took a stand and said “we believe the victims”.

Every bookstore owner, every Yeshiva head, every publisher who grappled with this and chose to pull those books off their shelves deserves to be applauded.

Each and every one of those decisions was a brave one, and long overdue.

But our daughters and sons deserve better. A lot better. Shifra deserved better.

We deserve better than to have one of our premier gedolim describe Walder’s crimes as “adultery”, and to accuse of murder those who raised their voices against this monster. We deserve better than having to witness the sendoff he got; from the mayor of B’nei B’rak providing a eulogy, to the large crowd at his funeral, to the chief rabbi of Israel visiting the shiva house without at least putting out a statement for his victims.

And we deserve better than to have our news media refer to Walder as A”H or Z”L (of blessed memory), or to have the story completely ignored for weeks by most of the mainstream press in our circles.

Because every time our press chooses to not report on this, a survivor understands: “an image is more important to protect than a child”
Every time you say “It’s Lashon Hora”, survivors hear “your story shouldn’t be shared”.
Every time you say “innocent until proven guilty”, we hear “you are lying”.

There has to be a better way. Because silence is what enables these horrors to happen in the first place, talking about it openly is the only way to fight it.

And what exactly does “innocent until proven guilty” even mean in this context?

Does it mean that I was lying when I told my best friend when it happened? What if I told my mother? My therapist years later? What if all their stories matched up?
Would that be enough to convince you?

Because that’s what happened in Walder’s case. With multiple victims. And the loved ones they confided in. Yet the defenders still shout this well-meaning, but misguided slogan.

How can someone be “proven guilty”? Will a guilty verdict in court convince you? Because I don’t see that making much difference to Berland’s defenders.

Because there will always be excuses. We will aways find ways to explain away unpleasant evidence against those we care about: “That newspaper is out to get frum jews. A frum person could never get a fair trial in that system. Those leftists and their anti-torah agenda”.

And therein lies the heart of the matter.

It’s this “us vs. them” component. It’s what makes us so quick to rush to defend “one of ours”, against “them”. And it’s not a bad impulse. We all do it, or at least feel it. It’s that urge to defend someone we love from criticism. That quickening of the heart we feel when someone insults something we care about.

It’s a survival mechanism. Something we as a people likely had no choice but to adopt over millennia of persecution. It’s not evil. There are no villainous leaders in our society who decree that it be this way. It is a mechanism by which Hashem has enabled us to survive through exile.

But like any other adaptive and protective behavior, it can become pathologic. And when it does, it can harm people we care about. For example, anxiety about a test can be adaptive in that it pushes you to study. But if left unchecked, it can cause you to yell at your loved ones. It can make you neglect other important things in your life.

So I ask you, if you care about us- your fellow brothers and sisters- please un-circle your wagons for us. We understand the urge for wagon circling when hearing scary and potentially destabilizing things. But that must be balanced with the need for growth and change, so that others don’t suffer the same fate.

Please stop hiding behind slogans like “innocent until proven guilty”, because that’s never how that phrase was intended to be used. That standard is intended for our legal system. It is meant to protect people from miscarriages of justice by law enforcement.

This same system also has standards such as “beyond a reasonable doubt”. Which is another good thing. It protects the rights of people to a fair trial. But it also means that the vast majority of abusers will never face justice in a court of law. Because most cases cannot be proven to that level.

Which leaves survivors with very little recourse for justice. All we have is the court of public opinion. Where we can tell our stories, and others can use their own logic to determine whether our stories hold water.

Please don’t shout us down using those empty slogans. Give us a chance to speak our truths. Maybe even publish our stories in mainstream orthodox press. Most importantly, please just listen to us with love like you would for a member of your family.

Because we are your family

NAME WITHHELD TO PROTECT PRIVACY

Jewish Children Were murdered, raped and abused and YeshivaWorld Ami and Mishpacha ignore the story

 

When it comes to writing against Israel, AMI is 'Rosh Ve'Rishon" to report it.

 Reading this week's Ami you would never know that Chaim Walder sexually abused and raped countless Jewish children, and made himself a martyr by blowing his brains out in a cemetery.

 They had pleanty of time to report the story before going to press.

The Yeshiva World Blog has proven itself to be a bunch of cowards and their sponsors should be boycotted ASAP. There was no mention of the sex fiend Walder all week.

The women writers of AMI and Mispacha should tell the publishers if this story is not reported they will walk out! 

How many victims will have to take their lives until the frum world recognizes that their are monsters among us and must be exposed for who they are? How many?

A Tale of Two Funerals

 Thousands by the funeral of the Monster Man Walder

Barely a minyan by Shifra Hoffman 

Shira Horowitz A"H Victim of the Monster Walder TAKES HER LIFE

 

I'll bet that this is not enough proof for those bastards that commented that Walder was innocent and that all reports were fabricated.

It's time to cut out all those "Loshon Hara" sermons now! 

Rabbi Edelstein and other rabbanim now have blood on their hands!

״מפני שנתפרסם עליו כמה פעמים שעבר בשאט נפש על איסורין הידועין לכל ישראל שהוא אסור, כנאוף וכיוצא בזה,על איש כזה מותר לקבל לשון הרע״. (חפץ חיים הלכות לשון הרע כלל ז׳ הל׳ ה׳).

The Rabbis Are Trying to Rehabilitate Chaim Walder. Here's Why They Will Fail

 

Walder was accused of sexual assault, but upon his death he was upgraded by some Charedi leaders to the status of a martyr. The attempt to rehabilitate him will be another self-inflicted blow to the rabbis’ authority

by Anshel Pfeffer

 There’s a long list of issues that the ultra-Orthodox media is forbidden to report on. At the top of the list is anything to do with sex. For example, when U.S. President Bill Clinton faced impeachment in the Monica Lewinsky affair, Yated Ne’eman, the daily newspaper of the Haredi “Lithuanian” stream, reported that Clinton was in danger of losing his job for lying.

Consensual or coerced, sex is a completely taboo subject. Cases of rape will never be reported. At most, in very rare cases, there will be an oblique reference to “immoral behavior.”

 Another subject on the list of unmentionable topics is suicide 

WHEN THE RAPIST PLAYS THE ROLE OF VICTIM: CHAIM WALDER’S LAST PERFORMANCE

 

I have taken a few days to mull over the recent atrocious events leading up to the final attack of a rapist against his victims. Yes, I am talking about the dead. About a dead man. A man whose נשמה was dead way before his גוף.

Rapists have no soul. In its’ place is an abysmal emptiness that prowls to fill the void with cruel pleasure. And just like the addict who is never satisfied and keeps needing a new fix, so too, the rapist. Like CHAIM WALDER.

There are two types of rape. The one where a rapist grabs a random person and rapes her/him. Then there is the calculated rapist who knows the victim well, including all her/his vulnerabilities, grooms the victim, initiates the sexual relationship, and rapes her/him over and over. The latter is much worse, because as opposed to the random rape attack, the rapist who is well acquainted with the victim oftentimes turns her/him into a sex slave, to the extent that the victim believes in the attacker and may even develop romantic feelings for the attacker, manifested as the Stockholm Syndrome.

The clever experienced rapist will create all types of alibis and evidences (just in case…) even while the attacks are going on. This type of rapist is not just content to rape, but when bored with the victim will secure innocence by threatening the victim with the shame of exposure or legal repercussions.

Though this type of rape happens in the secular world, tragically it is very common in the Frum world. If there are any witnesses, they usually turn away and will even be defensive of the rapist. The victim has nowhere to turn. Until the day that she/he decides to stand up to her/his attacker. In most cases it will work against the victim, because the rapist will create an image of victimhood in an attempt to make the accuser appear as the predator! Sounds twisted, but those who are familiar with such cases, will agree.

Chaim Walder cleverly used his power to feed his pleasure for sexual force. And he did that for a very long time. Kol Hakovod to the holy Rabbonim who stood up for the victims and condemned the acts of Chaim Walder.

The takeaway lesson from this ugly tale is that even though we finally see that justice could have taken place, the rapist still made sure to have the last say. Chaim Walder wrote an arrogant suicide letter, calling the Rabbonim to a Bais Din in shamayim. Even in his last moments of life, the rapist left the world with the self-created image of a victim.

by Baila Sebrow

High School Girl in Bnei Brak Walks out on her Principal's "Loshon Hara" Speech

 

Loose translation:

In one of the Bnei Brak high school for girls the principal came into one of the classes to give them a speech about the sin of taking someone elses' life, on Loshon Hara and on embarrassing someone in public.

During this mussar speech a distraught girl got up and yelled while sobbing:

"embarrassing someone?" "Loshon Hara?" "how do you have the chutzpa to lecture us on this? I am a victim of sexual abuse ... me... how do you speak like this here?"

She then got up and left!

The class sat there dumbfounded but learned a lesson they will never ever forget!

This was but one school, one class and one girl who got up and spoke...

This black morning, in many classes, the girls got a musser speech like this, and you can be sure that at least one girl of each class was sexually abused yet kept quiet feeling guilty and blaming themselves even more!

The Time Chaim Walder Gave My Daughter a Present

 

13 years ago, my then first-grader Maayan came home from school one day bubbling with excitement. Her school had hosted a celebrity guest that day, one of her favorite writers: Chaim Walder! And that hadn't been all.

My oldest daughter, then a 5th grader, told me that during his presentation, Chaim Walder had asked all the girls what they wanted to be when they grow up: "A nurse!" "A teacher!"  "A lawyer!" girls called out. And then one little girl called out, "I want to be a mother with a lot of children!"

Chaim Walder, my oldest daughter told me, got a big smile on his face: "Who said that?" he asked, "That is so wonderful! Incredible!"

And her classmates pointed out my little Maayan, whom Chaim Walder proceeded to call to the front of the auditorium, took out a copy of his book Kids Speak 3, wrote her a personal dedication, and handed it to her as a gift.

How tragic that today this story that once seemed so sweet and innocent makes me absolutely shudder from a string of impossible what-ifs. What if Walder had taken my daughter to a separate room and touched her inappropriately,  even sexually assaulted her, G-d forbid, as he did so many others over the years?

 

Today, my youngest child, Yoni, came home from 1st grade and told me matter of factly, "Chaim Walder committed suicide yesterday. He took a gun and shot himself by his son's grave. Because he did bad things." 

Thanks to Chaim Walder so many children, like my own, who've grow up on his books have gotten introduced to all sorts of new words over recent weeks: adultery, sexual assault, rape, and now suicide.

Which reminds me that Chaim Walder's victims weren't only the girls, women, boys and men  he took advantage of and sexually assaulted over the years. He had many other victims as well. First and foremost, his own wife whom he betrayed so many times over the years. The ex-husbands and devastated children of the married women he conducted affairs with, leaving in his wake broken homes and lives.

And I think also, on a certain level, among his victims were you and me and our children, his loyal and trusting readers. We entrusted Chaim Walder with our children's hearts and minds and souls,  And he proved himself unworthy of that trust, thus betraying us and our children. Over and over again.

And now Chaim Walder is dead. Baruch Dayan HaEmet. Blessed be the true Judge.

Yonasan Schwartz the "Chizuk from the Parsha" Guy who sent a message that Walder was innocent ..Is the Distributer of Kids Speak

 

What a sick world we are living in...Everyone is corrupt!

From a reader:

Did you know that Yonasan Schwartz is the American distributor for W*lder’s books, and he paid *a ton* of 💰💰 for the rights to sell books that are now almost totally worthless and that the only reason (that we know of so far) he’s doing this is just plain old filthy greed? 

Should Walder's Books be Burned?

 

Charedi Leadership Declares Moral Bankruptcy in the wake of the Walder Tragedy

 

First a note from DIN:
Walder did not commit murder because he was shamed by journalists or Rabbis Silman & Rabbi Eliyahu.

 It was on Sunday that the news broke that the police were investigating the allegations.
Why all of a sudden did he decide to murder himself- only after there was a threat of real consequences? 

Because he could live under the shadow of mere suspicion. There would still be support from fans who would have been hopeful that the accusations were false. His books wouldn't have been banned but at the worst remain in sequestered limbo. And while there would be no career, there would be no jail time. (Consider how a deal was made for another predator to avoid police involvement.)

All that changed on Sunday. It was the police investigation, not the rabbis or the press.

Now from The Rationalist Judaism Blog

As is well known, recently the immensely popular Israeli charedi author, Chaim Walder, was exposed by two extremely responsible journalists as having taken advantage of at least two women. Subsequently, it emerged that Walder - head of the Center for Child and Family in Bnei Brak - had taken advantage of his status to assault many women, girls and boys. A Beit Din in Safed led by Rav Shmuel Eliyahu heard testimony from twenty-two people - victims, rabbis and therapists - about a pattern of assault which had been going on for twenty-five years. And, if you know anything about such things, it's obvious that for every victim who testifies, there are countless more who prefer to remain silent. Walder himself heatedly denied all the allegations, but the overwhelming weight of testimony from such a wide range of people (along with recordings of Walder himself admitting to adultery) made it perfectly clear that he was guilty. He emerged as a horrific serial predator, ruining countless lives.

Now, every community has its monsters. Religious Zionism had its Motti Elon, Centrist/ Modern Orthodoxy had its Baruch Lanner, the US had its Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby, the UK had its Jimmy Saville. There's nothing indicting of the charedi community for it, too, to have its share of such predators. And initially, the response was encouraging. Eichlers announced that they would no longer be selling his books. Yated Neeman, for which Walder had written a column for many years, immediately dropped him. Radio Kol Chai, on which Walder had a regular show, also dropped him.

And then Walder shot himself. And suddenly, everything changed. 

The charedi websites Kikar Shabbos and Bechadrei Charedim posted obituaries for Walder which praised him glowingly. Yated Ne'eman ran a prominent obituary which instead of stating Shem Resha'im Yirkav, stated Zecher Tzaddik Livracha!

But it gets even worse.

At Walder's funeral, a hesped was delivered by the head of the immensely respected organization Ezer MiTziyon.

Another hesped was delivered by no less a person than the mayor of Bnei Brak.

At the shiva house, the mourners were honored with a visit by none other than the Chief Rabbi of Israel, Rav David Lau. (Yes, the family are also victims - but he didn't honor the other victims with a visit!)

But it gets even worse.

Rav Gershon Edelstein - one of the most respected rabbinic leaders in the Litvishe charedi world - issued a statement that all the people involved in making statements and issuing condemnations of Walder are guilty of publicly shaming him, and said that this is a worse crime than forbidden relations.

But it gets even worse.  

Rav Edelstein further declared that all these people forced him to commit suicide, and are therefore also guilty of murder.

The message to all victims of sexual abuse in the charedi community, and to all those trying to help them, is clear. Shut Up. The predator may be hurting people, but it's much worse to shame him, and you could even end up being guilty of murdering an important, respected member of the community.

The message to predators is also clear. We've Got Your Back. It's already very difficult for any victim of abuse to speak up, and we will try to make it as difficult as possible.

The charedi leadership has declared itself to be utterly, terribly, morally bankrupt. If you are in any way associated with that community, then you either publicly protest it, or you are effectively complicit.

 

Tutu the vicious antisemite drops dead

 

At a time when the statues of good people who had done bad things are being torn down, the world must reckon with the mixed legacy of Anglican Archbishop Desmond Tutu, even in the immediate aftermath of his death.

 He did much good in fighting apartheid but he also has long history of ugly hatred toward the Jewish people, the Jewish religion and the Jewish state. He not only believed in anti-Semitism, he actively promoted and legitimated Jew hatred among his many followers and admirers around the world. 

Tutu minimized the suffering of those killed in the Holocaust. He has attacked the “Jewish” — not Israeli — “lobby” as too “powerful” and “scary.” He has invoked classic anti-Semitic stereotypes and tropes about Jewish “arrogance,” “power” and “money.” He has characterized Jews a “peculiar people,” and has accused “the Jews” of causing many of the world’s problems.

 Tutu’s good deeds should not shield him from accountability for his long history of anti-Jewish bigotry. Let the record speak for itself, so that history may judge Tutu on the basis of his own words — words that he has often repeated and that others repeat, because Tutu is a role model for so many people around the world. 

Here are some of Tutu’s hateful words, carefully documented in a petition by prominent South Africans to terminate him as a “patron” of the two South African Holocaust Centers, because he used his status with these fine institutions as legitimization for his anti-Jewish rhetoric. 

I have publicized Tutu’s evil words in the past, but they warrant republication now that he is being lionized all over the world. 

He minimized the suffering of those murdered in the Holocaust by asserting that “the gas chambers” made for “a neater death” than did Apartheid. 

He complained of “the Jewish Monopoly of the Holocaust,” and demanded that its victims must “forgive the Nazis for the Holocaust,” while refusing to forgive the “Jewish people” for “persecute[ing] others.” 

Tutu asserted that Zionism has “very many parallels with racism,” thus echoing the notorious and discredited “Zionism equals racism” resolution passed by the General Assembly of the United Nations and subsequently rescinded.

Rabbi JJ Jacobson and Rabbi Eisenman Speak Out against the Dead Walder Pandering to Rapists Must Stop Now!

 

רב יעקבסאן בעניני דיומא pic.twitter.com/kRNv4rqS7C

— Hasidic_3 (@Hasidic_3) December 29, 2021

From Rabbi Eisenman, Rav of Ahavas Israel in Passaic:

CHAIM WALDER.....

(Chaim Waldler)

I could have ignored it, as most are.I could have sensationalized it as some are.

I could blame it on the people who asked me my opinion.However, all of that would not be truthful.

As a person who has had the painful experiences of crying with victims of sexual abuse for two and half decades, I have decided I cannot remain silent.

I CANNOT BE SILENT when I think of a beloved friend who was brought up in the heart of a Chassidic community and is now an avowed atheist.

When I am contacted by women who were violated and are now emotionally scarred, I cannot be silent.

And when I see people I used to respect downplaying, minimizing, and –worst of all blaming the victims, I cannot be silent.

There is no code of silence when someone is screaming in pain.

When one is silent, they are engaging in complacency and complicity.

Victim Speaks ...in a poem

Rav Shmuel Eliyahu Explains his Psak Against Chaim Walder

 

The following Teshuva was posted on the Facebook page of Rav Shmuel Eliyahu, explaining his Bais Din’s psak against Chaim Walder:

Question: How was the Bais Din allowed to establish Chaim Walder’s guilt without hearing directly from the accused? Especially since they paskened (with certainty) that he was guilty?

1. The Halacha requires us as Rabbanim to act against people who defile Bais Yisrael. This involvement is not done with conventional parameters of Bais Din and we are not required to accept testimony before the defendant. Even more so when he regularly threatened women and they feared him.
2. Despite this, we checked, investigated and questioned thoroughly. Witnesses testified that he committed adultery with married women for many years and they were forced to divorce because they were prohibited from their husbands. We saw rulings from other Batei Din about these issues and supported the findings with additional unanimous evidence. In addition, we heard recordings in his own voice that attest to serious immoral acts, and we found him guilty without a doubt.
3. Although it was clear to him that he was destroying homes, and causing Jewish families to be hurt and become tamei, he continued this behavior without stopping for a moment. We heard testimonies about 22 women and girls whom he assaulted, and there is no doubt that these cases are just a small fraction of the evil that he did.
4. The Torah teaches us to treat Walder’s actions iwith the same severity as if it was murder. “For as a man will stand up against another man and murder him so is this thing.” Such acts bring anger upon Klal Yisrael, evil decrees, and prevent our prayers from being heard.
5. According to Halacha we are allowed to publicly lash him, threaten him, and humiliate him. We may remove him from being a shliach tzibbur and stop him from teaching Jewish children. In addition to many other things that are not customary today.
6. We don’t do these things [nowadays], but we are still obligated to stop him. If we don’t warn the public about his actions and he continues, the blame will be on us, chalilah. Due to the great responsibility on us to stop this [behavior] from happening in the future, we were forced to stop these abominations.
7. We called upon Walder to take upon himself a path of teshuva. We sent people to convince him to repent, in order to prevent a huge Chilul Hashem when his actions became public. Instead of repenting, he chose to threaten us through his messengers, just as they tried to threaten Rav Yehuda Silman shlit”a who paskened that people to remove Walder’s books from their homes. It’s a pity that he doesn’t (didn’t) surrender and follow a path of teshuva.

Support Victims Of Abuse ...

 

(By Zvi Gluck)

Seven and a half  years ago, we created Amudim with a mission: to give a voice to the victims of sexual abuse and eradicate stigmas so that those who had been victimized could get the help they needed to heal. Baruch Hashem, we have come so far since we first opened our doors, which is what makes recent events so troubling.

Several weeks ago news broke regarding an influential member of our community, with dire accusations. The story has come to a shocking end with the accused taking his own life.