Radical Haredi campaign draw cartoons that depict Hareidi soldiers as 'national trash can' and "predatory bacteria"!

Time to throw these miserable parasites out of the country! 
These Cartoons are similar to the Nazi Cartoons depicting Jews in Der Sturmer!

The 'national trash can' in the 'hardak manufacturing factory' (Photo: Daniel Goldman)

New drawings inciting against ultra-Orthodox IDF soldiers have been distributed in haredi concentrations and social networks in recent days, as part of radical circles' battle against the impending IDF draft law and the plan to force yeshiva students to join military or national service.

The anonymous campaign managers have published several cartoons created by children who have joined the battle against the "draft decree." The drawings were posted on bulletin boards in radical haredi concentrations, and the leaders of the campaign have promised to release additional cartoons soon.

Carttom shows Frum soldiers going up in flames

Troops likened to bacteria

One of the posters shows haredi soldiers going up in flames inside a military post, crying out "help" and "Tata" (father in Yiddish – a common cry of despair in the haredi sector). Next to them stands a satisfied, smiling man-fox wearing an IDF uniform, with a beard and a skullcap, apparently symbolizing the person responsible for their recruitment and burning.

Another drawing presents a yeshiva student and haredi children fleeing a haredi soldier and crying out: "Predatory hardak" (a derogatory term for haredi soldiers used within their own communities).

Orthodox in Uniform

Haredi soldier: Our life is a nightmare / Tali Farkash D. has been pelted with stones, B.’s uniform has been stolen off clothesline, H.’s door has been vandalized with graffiti, A. is constantly denounced by acquaintances, and M. defines life as ‘constant terror.’ As campaigns against IDF draft gain momentum, ultra-Orthodox troops experience growing hostility, including verbal and physical assaults Full story

One cartoon shows the "national trash can of the IDF and civil service," which yeshiva students are forcibly shoved into – and then come out shaved, in uniform and red berets.

One of the ads includes several children's cartoons which warn against the "poison of the hardak bacteria," refer to the soldiers as the "Cantonists of Israel of 2013," warn that "child abductors are roaming the market" and present a former haredi crying out: "Save me, I've became a hardak, I regret it."

Ironically, one of the posters is sponsored by the "Proper Speech Institute," which preaches against "slander, disagreement and humiliation." In order to justify its participation in the campaign, the institute quotes from the holy book "Chafetz Chaim" on Jewish ethics and laws of speech, which deals with these bans. "Instead of the destruction and demolition of religion… it is a great mitzvah and duty to do everything in one's power."

'To be or not to be'

Meanwhile, the drawings' distributors appear to be opening another front – this time against moderate haredi elements who are trying to harm the campaign. A leaflet distributed to synagogue managers urges them to document acts of vandalism against the ads or theft of propaganda material.

The works of art inciting against haredi troops (Photo: Daniel Goldman)

The radical circles attribute the acts to "striking forces of the army and Nahal and civil-national service," and plead with the synagogue managers: "At the instruction of the rabbis, may they live long and happily… whoever meets a suspected guy of this kind must follow him and document the theft in a regular camera or one installed on a pen… so that we can handle these guys according to the way of the Torah.

"These days, dear generous people have begun purchasing hidden cameras which will be operated in certain synagogue, where the hardak thefts are particularly active," the leaflets stated. "There is a lot of work of course, so the public must contribute and help.

"Jew, remember! Every booklet and every information paper is a very precious weapon. It has the power to prevent a Jewish soul from falling into the impurity and filth of the army and civil-national service. We are in a fighting retreat – to be or not to be… May we enhance the prestige of the Torah and cut down the evil."

Famous Badchan Joseph Schwartz arrested for sexually assaulting a minor!

Joseph Schwartz looking to attack garbage can

Joseph Schwartz  ( יוסף הערש שווארטץ )  of Williamsburg was arrested yesterday 1/29/2014 on charges relating to sexually assaulting a minor. יוסף שווארטץ is from Williamsburg and is a comedian by many weddings and bar mitzvahs.

There is currently an open investigation taking place. If You or someone you know were abused by Joseph Schwartz ( יוסף הערש שווארטץ )  please contact  NYPD Sex Crimes Unit at (718) -330-5600 immediately or you may contact JCW at Info@JewishCommunityWatch.org  All names and information will be kept strictly confidential.

Address: 53 Division ave Brooklyn Ny 11249

The story behind the story from 

Boorey Deutsch

How the Satmer Community of Monroe (Aroynem) turns AGAIN there back on victims of sexual abuse.....!!!

The victim in the Joseph Schwartz case was sent by his Yeshivah/School to see a therapist/vad of Monroe for help since he complained that he was abused by a person outside the community, which is a very big step from the School for sending him for help (but still wrong for not reporting it rightaway. But lets not go there now) the so called Vad from monroe was convinced about the allegations against Mr. schwartz and has told the now 18 year old boy that they have heard from others that Schwartz is a monster and he needs to be arrested (which is a very big step from the Vad, its called PROGRESS) finally the boy found some courage..... Lets go back a little>

The boy was only 15 years old when he was molested the first time by this monster in a Mkivah, the boy went and told the Rabbi from the Shul and others around like family & teachers in Yeshivah, and guess what they have told him??? "Go home, you are lying, stop making such story's up" and he went home and was not able to have a full night of sleep since....

Now lets go back to where we were up too.... It took about 3 years for the boy to finally break and go to the police by the push of the Vad of Monroe (dont forget its after 3 years of being pushed around and abused by the monster Schwartz over and over again and again, just because no one wanted to believe him)

Now after the arrest came to light, the same Vad, listen clearly here.... The same Vad that told him to report to the police turned against him just after the arrest.. How?? They went to the Grand Rabbi Aron Teitelbom and told him that this Bucher went to the police to report the abuse, they have called up everyone in the Yeshivah/School and told them what he has done and how horrible it is for the School and he is a Muser.

the Bucher returned to Yeshivah a few hours after the arrest and was gang approached by many in his community and school boys screaming after him Muser and that he is wrong with going to the police, he dosn't belong here and so on, the Vad has turned a laughing face right in front of him........ What is this?? U support him and encourage him to go to the police and then u turn a blind eye on him as he never spoke to u in his life??? Why?? Because you chickened out and u want to protect your name in the community??? Really???

Well i am really sorry Mr. Teitelbom from the so called Vad of Monroe, u know why?? Because the Bucher was smarter then u and recorded the conversation between u and him how u encourage him to go to the police and how u telling him that anyone that touches underage boys needs to be arrested and off the streets forever...

I will post the recording in order to be able to prove how wrong and how corrupt the community is. I hope this will break the fake game in the community.
The recordings will be posted as soon as we get em (yes i already heard the recording)

They were shacked and scared that it will come back to them so they ran and turned there back on a victim AGAIN!!!

Leading Rabbis say that the app "Whats Up" causes divorces!

Cleaning lady uses talis for a tablecloth

Car carrying the Gerrer Rebitzen runs over little child in Bnei Brak,

The wife of the grand rabbi of Gur after the incident 

The Haredi World reports that a little boy was left with serious injuries after the Gerrer Rebitzen's  car ran him over in the Israeli city of Bnei Brak. 

The car failed to  to stop at a stop sign on Hoshea Street.

As a result, the eight year-old boy was hit in the head and was transported to a local hospital.

Interestingly, the Gerrer Rebbi, a millionaire,  does not allow his followers to own or drive cars.

Rabbi Abraham Benjamin Silberberg, a senior rabbi in Gur, has issued eleven new decrees for Gur followers.

Rule number 8 on the list prohibits men from getting a driver’s license. “It is self understood that women are also banned from driving,” the letter states.

Rule number 9 prohibits men from riding bicycles.

Rule number 10 also prohibits families from going to a hotel.

Israeli Yated blames Israel for global anti-Semitism?

 An op-ed in the popular Israeli ultra-Orthodox daily newspaper Yated Ne’eman on Thursday says that Israel is to blame for the increase in global anti-Semitism, and that as long as the Haredim continues to be harassed, and religious adherence continues to slip—-it will only get worse.

THE TIMES OF ISRAEL  reports that the op-ed particularly calls out Israel’s founders, saying they “hoped that the established state would solve the problem of anti-Semitism. They sought to save the bodies at the cost of forsaking the souls.”

“Salvation is dependent on one condition—-that the will of God be done,” the piece states. “The more Haredim and torah scholars are harassed, the more Jews will be harassed around the globe.”

The op-ed comes on the heels of Sunday’s release of the Annual Anti-Semitism Report from Israel’s Information and Diaspora Ministry, which said that despite the fact that actual violent attacks on Jews worldwide was down in 2013, anti-Semitic sentiment is increasing.

How Absurd? How crazy can one be to believe this stuff?
 And what a vile and disgusting piece of printed word. If it wouldn't have been for the "Zionist "state, the Jews of the camps and europe who not have had a safe haven. 

If it wouldn't have been for the "Zionist" state, the chareidim of today would not be riding the number 2 bus in safety to daven at the Kosel. 

If it wouldn't be for the "Zionist" state they wouldn't all be able to schnor from the very government that they hate while other Jewish souls, somebody's son, husband , father or brother die and spill blood so they can live in safety with their hands out.

This article implies that its ok that 1/3 of the country, and increasing, not only don't work but also expects this very "wicked government" to support them as well. 
Kids are starving and living in gaza-like conditions but its all mesiras nefesh for torah. Where else in the whole wide world can you find this situation feasible?

Chareidi Gangsters trying to evict Chareidi Soldier from Elad because he wears the IDF uniform!

It's time to tell all Israeli Schnorrers that if their parasite counterparts in Israel don't stop harassing Chareidie solders, we will not support them financially.
I already told a Schnorrer that I will only give him a donation if he promises to  announce in his shul that "it's important  to start respecting the frum IDF. 
He answers that he does not feel that way; I grabbed the check back from him and tore it up!

And now back to the News:

An IDF soldier assigned to one of the military’s chareidi units is having a difficult time at home, in his community of Elad. 

During recent weeks he received notices insisting that he refrain from returning to and leaving from their home dressed in uniform, suggesting that he inquire with IDF officials towards permitting him to come and go in civilian clothing.

The letters however did not stop with the recommendation as Walla News adds the neighborhood committee is unwilling to tolerate this young man coming and going in uniform.

 He was instructed to leave the neighborhood within two weeks or the vaad will have to have his rental agreement invalidated and he will then have to leave Elad.

Elad City Hall officials explain they are not aware of the case and when they are informed, officials will know how to respond.

The Office of the IDF Spokesman statement reads, “The IDF denounces and condemns any attempt to harm its soldiers who work day and night in defense of the country.”

New Herpes Case because of Metzizah B'Peh in NYC

ALERT FROM THE NEW YORK HEALTH DEPARTMENT!

January 28, 2014

Direct orogenital suction during ritual Jewish circumcision (also known as metzitzah b’peh) has been documented to transmit herpes simplex virus (HSV) type 1 to newborn males (1-4). In January 2014, the New York City (NYC) Department of Health and Mental Hygiene received a report of a new case of HSV-1 infection in a newborn male infant following direct orogenital suction. To date, a total of 14 laboratory-confirmed cases of HSV-infection attributable to direct orogenital suction have been reported to the Health Department since 2000. Two of these infants died, and at least two others suffered brain damage (4).

In the most recent case, the infant was the term product of a full-term pregnancy and normal vaginal delivery. 

He had ritual Jewish circumcision including direct orogenital suction on day of life 8. On day of life 13, at a well-child visit, a rash was noted on and around genitals. 

The baby was treated with topical antibacterial ointment. 

On day of life 16, the baby returned to his provider for worsening rash, and a topical anti-fungal was added to the regimen. 

On day of life 18, lesions progressed to include the perineum and the right foot. HSV infection was suspected, and the infant was referred to a pediatric dermatologist. 

The next day, upon evaluation of the baby, the dermatologist, also suspecting HSV, collected specimens for direct visualization and for viral culture, and the baby was admitted to a hospital for treatment. 

The location of herpes lesions (on the genitals and on the foot, a dermatomal distribution reflecting involvement of sacral nerves), viral type (HSV type 1, which is commonly found in the mouth of adults), and timing of infection (5 days after circumcision) are consistent with transmission during direct contact between the mouth of the ritual circumciser (mohel) and the newly circumcised infant penis.

Cuomo Cartoon

An Ex Shiksa writes

I used to be a shiksa. A very good shiksa; pure British blood, blonde-haired and from a good family of Bible-believing Christians. Then I came to Israel and fell in love.

I fell in love with a country, with a religion and with a people. Later on, I fell in love with an Israeli. Not just any Israeli, a sabra, a good Jerusalem boy whose mother’s family had escaped from the Nazis in Europe and whose father was the son of a Rabbi from Yemen. Despite the fact I was an ex-shiksa, they welcomed me with warmth and acceptance into their family.

shiksa. A very good shiksa; pure British blood, blonde-haired and from a good family of Bible-believing Christians. Then I came to Israel and fell in love.

Now I am a proud Jew, an ardent Zionist, and still deeply enamored with my country, my people and my religion … and I have three gorgeous dark Israeli kids who don’t look anything like me.

When I first came to study at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, it was because, as a scholar of theology and history, I had always been interested in Judaism and the Jewish people. Three weeks after I arrived, a suicide bomber blew himself up on a bus on its way to the University, killing one of my ulpan classmates. It was tempting to flee, but I stayed. I had found the place I wanted to be and terror was not going to move me away from where my soul felt at peace.

I don’t think that people come to study in Israel, no matter how great the universities are here, if they don’t have some kind of pre-existing interest or curiosity about Israel and Judaism. It is not hard to believe that the Prime Minister’s son’s girlfriend, who is probably not enjoying her fifteen minutes of fame as the world’s most famous shiksa at the moment, was drawn to our country and people for some reason as well.

I chose to tie my fate with that of the Jewish people and join the family. I underwent an orthodox conversion in Jerusalem with some wonderful rabbis who told me from the outset, “First be a good person, then be a good Jew,” and that is how I live my life. I may not be the best Jew but I definitely try. I fill my life and raise my family with Jewish values and traditions; we celebrate holidays, observe ancient rituals; we live and breathe the history of our People in our daily lives.

I joined a long line of shiksas who chose to become part of the Jewish People. Shiksas like Ruth who said, ““Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God,” and even Moses’ wife, Zipporah the Cushite could be considered a convert to Judaism.  But without a doubt my favorite biblical shiksa/convert is Rahab, from the Book of Joshua.

A rather unpleasant experience happened to me during my conversion process. My rabbis were amazing, godly people, but my encounter with the rabbinical establishment in Israel was less ‘spiritual’. The whole process is run on the basis of suspicion and accusation. Heaven forbid that someone might actually want to join the Jewish people because of their deep belief in the religion’s tenets. The highlight for me was when a Shaliach Beit HaDin (a rabbinical court official) told me that because I had too many stamps in my passport, I couldn’t open a conversion file at the Interior Ministry because they were suspicious that I might be a “call girl”. I kid you not.

When I completed the conversion process and the day came to immerse in the mikvah and officially become a Jewess, they asked me what name I would take. I answered that my Jewish name would be Rahab. “No, no, no,” they protested. “You cannot be Rahab, you must mean Rachel.” They would not accept such a choice and in the end half my documents say “Rahab” and the other half read “Rachel.” But in my heart, I am Rahab and proud of it.

Rahab was a great biblical figure. She believed in the God of Israel and helped the Israelites. She had an impressive Jewish husband, Joshua, and among her descendants you can find a who’s who list of priests and prophets. And they called her a “call girl” as well.

Years later, when I served in government, I had the opportunity to represent both the Prime Minister, and all the converts in a sense, on the Halfon Committee, an Inter-Ministerial Committee set up to examine the overall organizational structure and pooling of resources in the area of conversion in Israel. Our recommendations, which unfortunately were not all implemented, included the appointment of volunteer rabbis for the special courts for conversion; granting independent status as well as necessary authority to the Conversion Administration in the Office of the Prime Minister and recognition of the unique status of the Joint Institute for Jewish Studies.

I hoped, and still hope, that the conversion process in Israel can be improved so that those who earnestly want to join the Jewish people and tie their fate with ours can be welcomed and nurtured, not humiliated and accused.

David Breakstone, the Vice-Chairman of the World Zionist Organization, recently wrote a blog post about the problem of recognition of the Judaism of the love of his son’s life and the difficulties of the conversion requirements in Israel. Now the Prime Minister’s son is in love with a shiksa, who maybe one day might want to join the Jewish people (as did his father’s second wife), maybe Netanyahu should invest some time and effort into streamlining and improving the conversion process so that it will allow sincere shiksas to become righteous Jews who will raise happy Jewish families in the Land of Israel.

Read more: On shiksas, love and the prime minister's son | Rachael Risby-Raz | Ops & Blogs | The Times of Israel http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/on-shiksas-love-and-the-prime-ministers-son/#ixzz2rnEj1yuX
Follow us: @timesofisrael on Twitter | timesofisrael on Facebook

Moshe Taubenfeld Sexual abuse case adjourned for two months, video

The case of a rabbi accused of molesting a young man in New Square over five years has been adjourned for two months. 

Activists showed up at the first public court appearance last night of Rabbi Moshe Taubenfeld. A young New Square man claims the highly-regarded rabbi and mentor sexually abused him for five years after he went to him for solace after Sept. 11. The allegations reignited claims that other sexual abuse cases have been covered up.

"It's clear that many victims of child molestation in New Square are getting angry at the corruption that allows child molestation to continue," says Rabbi Noson-Leiter of Monsey. Noson-Leiter attended the hearing with other activists who say they want to make sure justice gets served for the alleged victim. 

Also at the hearing was Yossi, who shared his story with News 12 last year. Yossi became the first sex abuse victim from New Square to ever seek justice through the courts. Taubenfeld's younger brother, Hershel, was convicted of molesting Yossi, but managed to avoid prison time.

Taubenfeld's attorney is urging the judge to resist comparing his client to his younger brother, saying he's innocent. If Taubenfeld is found guilty, he would likely become the first sex offender from New Square to serve prison time.

Jewish Lady Peggy Nadell murdered in her home on Shabbos in Rockland County

As police continue to investigate the murder of a Valley Cottage woman, her friends are remembering her for her devotion to community activism.

Peggy Nadell, 81, was found stabbed to death in her house on Andover Road. Her daughter made the gruesome discovery and called 911. 

Police believe Nadell was killed sometime between Friday night and early Saturday morning. They haven't revealed if her house had been robbed or not.

Friends say Nadell was a community activist who passionately devoted her life to Democratic politics, women's rights and the environment. Clarkstown Supervisor Alex Gromack, who knew Nadell for more than 20 years, says she was dedicated to making Rockland County a better place to live. 

"She couldn't have had an enemy in the world," says Gromack. "She was a lovely person."

Police say no arrests have been made. Nadell's funeral will be this Wednesday at the Hellman Memorial Chapel in Spring Valley.

Failed Messiah being sued because he refuses to take off post claiming Innocent lady is a pedophile!

A Queens woman says an Orthodox blog has falsely damned her as a pedophile — without being given a chance to state her innocence, according to a lawsuit.

Preschool teacher Marisa Trachtenberg, 31, was charged on a sex-abuse charge in August with kissing a 15-year-old girl in 2006 — an allegation she vehemently denies.

Although the charges were quickly dismissed, Trachtenberg claims “she lives in hell” because a Minnesota blogger who reported the arrest implied the victim was a young child and that there were “potentially many more victims,” according to a December Queens Supreme Court suit.

Although a lawyer alerted Shmayra Rosenberg, who runs failedmessiah.typepad.com, that the statements were “false and defamatory,” Rosenberg refuses to remove the post.

Rosenberg “did not check the source of his information” and “acted in reckless disregard for the truth,” according to court papers. “A simple visit to the court or phone call to Marisa Trachtenberg would have resulted in access to the pleadings.”

Rosenberg claims it’s on Trachtenberg to provide proof of her innocence — although the blogger never requested such evidence when Trachtenberg’s lawyer asked that the post be removed.

“I did not speak to Trachtenberg” before writing about the arrest, he told The Post. “I had a credible source who told me the child was very young and that they were afraid there were more victims,” he told The Post.

Trachtenberg says she lost her job, has been unable to get another one, and has been “totally ostracized by the Orthodox community.”

She’s asking a judge to force Rosenberg to take down the post, as well as for unspecified damages.

Trachtenberg

Notice: Last week Rosenberg supported the Post Stark headline, now see what he thinks of the Post when the shoe is now on the other foot.... notice the way he blames the "chareidim" for this article!???????

Rosenberg responds:

The New York Post omitted key facts from a story in order to try to smear me.

What follows shows that Post did this intentionally and willfully.

If someone claims a post I wrote is false or defammatory or "hurtful," does that person have to provide details and facts to prove that claim? Or am I obligated to remove the post simply becuase an unspecific claim has been made?

The law is clear. I have no obligation to remove the post or to update the post.

In this case, an accused pedophile's attorney wrote to me claiming that "[y]our website contains inaccurate hurtful information regarding our client.  We would like to avoid a defamation of character suit and please ask that you kindly remove this article from your website. Please contact our offices to discuss this matter further."

I responded this way, "She was arrested, as you know, and you have no legal basis for a lawsuit."

Note the attorney provided no specifics. He didn't claim the alleged victim was older or that the abuse did not take place or even that the charges were dropped or that his client was innocent.

Also note that he did not respond to my email.

Therefore, I had no legal obligation to do anything. As far as I knew, the case was still active and nothing I reported was wrong.

Note that the Post was told by Trachtenberg's attorney that I never responded to his email – which is false and which the Post knew to be false. But as you'll see below, that lie by Trachtenberg's attorney is not in the Post's report. Neither is the reason for the dismissal of the case against Trachtenberg. (I've been told it has to do with a statute of limitations question caused in part by a prosecutor's error – but I have not yet been able to confirm this.)

Also note that the Post repeatedly refused to share the lawsuit with me so I could respond to it or to tell me why the case was dropped – something they don't tell readers, either.

This is a hit job done in part to placate the haredi community and to make up for its Menachem Stark "Who didn't want him dead?" cover. And what this should tell you is that nothing the Post reports can be trusted.

Russian Student gets arrested for possessing Weapons of Mass Destruction, and the Media Totally Ignores it!

Vladislav Miftakhov

On Friday evening, Pennsylvania authorities arrested a Russian citizen for reportedly possessing a weapon of mass destruction.

Police arrested Vladislav Miftakhov, a 19-year old who the Altoona Mirrorreports is an engineering student at Penn State Altoona, after finding "a suspected bomb and other bomb-making materials inside a suitcase." They had originally gone to his residence to investigate reports that he was growing marijuana at his home. 

Miftakhov "is charged with possessing a weapon of mass destruction, risking a catastrophe, possession with intent to deliver marijuana, possessing instruments of crime, prohibited offensive weapons, incendiary devices, recklessly endangering another person, possession of controlled substances and possession of drug paraphernalia."

A bomb squad "safely deconstructed the suspected bomb," which Miftakhov said was made with materials he purchased over the Internet.

Netanyahu gets flack because his son is dating a Shiksa

 Following a week in which Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu spoke glowingly at the World Economic Forum to Norwegian PM Erna Solberg over his 23 year-old son Yair’s relationship with a 25 yea-old Norwegian girl, the Israeli anti-assimilation group Lehava is calling on the PM to intervene and end his son’s relationship.

NEWS.WALLA.co.il (http://bit.ly/MfTaUI) is reporting that Benzi Gofshtein, CEO for Lehava—-a right-wing group whose mission statement is to prevent Jews from marrying non-Jews—-blasted Netanyahu while calling on him to intervene, saying, “Your father is turning in his grave.”

The relationship between Yair and Sandra Leikanger—-both communications majors who met at IDC—-went viral this week after Netanyahu’s comments to the Norwegian PM about how proud he is of his son.

Pictures of the couple in Norway over the summer on Leikanger’s Facebook page had to be restricted after the Norwegian press got hold of the story.

Now, Gofshtein and Lehava are calling on Netanyahu to step in, telling the PM, “Your father Benzion was a Jew and a Zionist has many rights that natural sons of Jews value. It’s hard to believe that assimilation will enter through the front door of your house. Your son’s actions and implications are far, far from both the family and national aspect. His children and your grandchildren will not be Jewish, not on the national level of the son of the Prime Minister of Israel.”

Continuing, Gofshtein said,“What kind of example is this for the son of the Prime Minister of the Jewish State—-which invests millions in preventing assimilation abroad—-to have assimilation occur in his own house? Your father is turning in his grave over his son’s actions, allowing his legacy to die out through his grandchildren because of a marriage to a non-Jew.”

North Korea lands man on the sun?

Maybe they are all ready to go to hell!
The source for this is something I've never heard of before today - a web site called Waterford Whispers News. There was a report last year from Investors Business Daily that the Norks had announced their intention to put a man on the sun.

I can't find anything on the English-language version of the KCNA, which is the Norks' official news agency site, but the report says it was uttered in a televised newscast for which they offer no video as backup. I don't know. I suppose it says everything about the madcap nature of this regime that you find it hard believe they would really make such a claim, but you can't be entirely sure.

It reported that astronaut Hung Il Gong left for the sun on a specially designed rocket ship at approximately 3am this morning.

Hung, who traveled alone, reached his destination some four hours later, landing his craft on the far side of the lonely star.

“We are very delighted to announce a successful mission to put a man on the sun.” a North Korean central news anchor man said on a live broadcast earlier. “North Korea has beaten every other country in the world to the sun. Hung Il Gong is a hero and deserves a hero’s welcome when he returns home later this evening.”

The specially trained astronaut is expected to return back to earth at 9pm tonight, where he will meet his uncle and supreme leader Kim Jong-un.

It is understood that the 17-year-old ‘space explorer’ traveled at night to avoid being engulfed by the suns rays, and that this genius approach has brought the soviet state to the top of the global space rankings.

While on the sun, Mr. Hung collected sun spot samples to bring back to his supreme leader as a present.

The 18 hour mission is already being called the ‘greatest human achievement of our time’ by the North Korean central news agency.