Monday, May 1, 2023

Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of ‘When Bad Things Happen to Good People,’ dies at 88

 

 Many years ago I read his book, because this question is something that frum people quietly ask themselves, not in a public forum, not wanting to brand themselves "apikorsim." I heard this discussed in shul by survivors who were dragged thru hell just a few years prior. I heard this question come up in very frum Shiva houses. This is discussed openly in kaballa seforim and no one accuses them of being "apikorsim." 

But the question is a lot stronger than their answers.

So because of my curiosity of what Kushner would say, I read the book cover to cover as it is very easy reading.

It seems that Harold Kushner a Conservative or Reform rabbi lost a child and because of this loss he decided to put pen to paper and take a shot at it. 

I was very disappointed with his answer. He did find comfort in his answer, but I found it very disturbing.

He basically tells people who have had a tragedy such as losing a child, not to take it personally, since Hashem is not the one who masterminded this, since Hashem doesn't target you or your family personally, Hashem, according to his hypotheses, lets the world run its course with absolutely no intervention (chas ve'sholom), and therefore events like the Holocaust and pogroms happen. It left me asking myself, how did Kushner find any comfort in that?

A frum Jew that goes through an enormous tragedy such as losing a child doesn't want to hear that Hashem just "walked away, and let the world just happen." I don't think that he gets any comfort in that. He wants to know that there was a divine purpose for this child to be born, to this particular family , and that  this child was given x amount of years to fulfill his or her mission and tasks in this world and that Hashem is actually the One orchestrating all this and that this is all part of His plan. Knowing that it was not just a "coincidence" but was part of a greater plan, does give some comfort to the grieving family, the fact that Kushner didn't believe in this, is very sad, and it is even sadder, knowing that his book was a best seller, meaning that many people who were looking for answers may have found this book still wanting.

May Hashem comfort all those who have had these losses!

Rabbi Harold Kushner, one of the most influential congregational rabbis of the 20th century whose works of popular theology reached millions of people outside the synagogue, has died.

Kushner, who turned 88 on April 3, died Friday in Canton, Massachusetts, just miles from the synagogue where he had been rabbi laureate for more than three decades.

Kushner’s fairly conventional trajectory as a Conservative rabbi was altered shortly after arriving at Temple Israel of Natick when, on the day his daughter Ariel was born, his 3-year-old son Aaron was diagnosed with a fatal premature aging condition, progeria.


“When Bad Things Happen to Good People,” published in 1981, represented Kushner’s attempt to make sense of Aaron’s suffering and eventual death, just days after his 14th birthday. It was turned down by two publishers before being released by Schocken Books, a Jewish imprint.

​​In the book, Kushner labors to reconcile the twin Jewish beliefs in God’s omnipotence and his benevolence with the reality of human suffering. ”Can I, in good faith, continue to teach people that the world is good, and that a kind and loving God is responsible for what happens in it?” he writes.

Ultimately, he concludes that God’s ability is limited when it comes to controlling the hazards of life that result in tragedy on a widespread and smaller scale, such as the Holocaust and the death of a child.

It is a view that runs afoul of traditional Jewish teaching about God, and it earned Kushner critics among some Orthodox Jews and also drew rebuttals from other Jewish theologians. But it resonated widely for a long time and with many people, Jewish and non-Jewish, rocketing to the top of The New York Times’ best-seller list. More than 4 million copies have been sold in at least a dozen languages.

He scaled back his duties at his synagogue, then stepped away, as other books followed, tackling topics equally as daunting: the meaning of life, talking to children about God, overcoming disappointment. “To Life: A Celebration of Jewish Being and Thinking,” published in 1993, became a go-to resource for people exploring Judaism, while “Living a Life That Matters: Resolving the Conflict Between Conscience and Success,” published in 1986, was another best-seller.

“I think that Rabbi Kushner was successful because he catered to everybody,” Carolyn Hessel, the director of the Jewish Book Council, said in 2017 when it revived the Lifetime Achievement Award to honor Kushner. “He reached everybody’s heart. It wasn’t just the Jewish heart. He reached the heart of every human being.”

Kushner was born in Brooklyn and educated in the New York City public schools. After his ordination at the Jewish Theological Seminary in 1960, he went to court to have his military exemption waived.

For two years he served as a military chaplain in Oklahoma before assuming his first pulpit, as an assistant rabbi at another Temple Israel, this one in Great Neck, New York.

Four years later he moved to Natick, where he remained even as he became a celebrity. In 1983, with his book a best-seller and demanding more of his time, Kushner cut back to part-time at the synagogue. Seven years later he stepped down to devote himself fully to writing.

The congregation, believing their then-55-year-old rabbi too young to be named rabbi emeritus, made Kushner their rabbi laureate, a title held by only a handful of American spiritual leaders.

It would be one of a growing number of accolades: Kushner was honored by the Roman Catholic organization the Christophers as someone who made the world a better place, and the organization Religion in America named him clergyman of the year in 1999. In 2004 he read from the book of Isaiah at the state funeral of President Ronald Reagan.

He remained involved in the Conservative movement after leaving the pulpit, serving as a leader in the New England region of its rabbinical association and, with the novelist Chaim Potok, editing its 2001 Etz Hayim Torah commentary.

“My seminary training was all about Jewish answers. My congregational experience has been more in terms of Jewish questions,” Kushner told JTA in 2008. “I start with the anguish, the uncertainty, the lack of fulfillment I find in the lives of the very nice, decent people who are in this synagogue and who are my readers. And Judaism is the answer.”

He added, “How do I live a fulfilling life is the question. And Judaism is the answer.”

Kushner’s wife, Suzette, died in 2022, 45 years after their son Aaron. Kushner is survived by his daughter, Ariel Kushner Haber, and two grandchildren.

6 comments:

Garnel Ironheart said...

I read this book and did a review on it in university.
Here's how I understood Kushner's thesis - God, having created the world, then decided to sit back and let everything run its natural course. You can pray, you can cry, but He just lets things happen. Why do bad things happen to good people? Because why not? It's all a random chance. If a child is hit by a drunk driver, there's no cosmic explanation. It just happened.
How is this a source of comfort for him? Because when bad things happen to good people, especially if that good people is you, then a difficult question is asked: How can I keep my faith in God as loving and kind if He struck me and I didn't deserve it? With Kushner's approach, you no longer have to struggle with that question because, well, stuff just happens. Deal with it.

Anonymous said...

If one doesnt buy into gilgul (R. Saadia Gaon did not, for example), then, say tradegy occurring to children is very difficult to stomach if one says God is behind it, or even to an adult if one feels the suffering is out of proportion to the crime. Instead of overly doubting oneself or feeling targeted by HaShem, it can potentially be easier to say that God did not necessarily want it to occur but that this is the way of world (Rambam, Ramban etc believe that, at least for individuals that arent on the highest levels), and that God will make it right in the next world. Diff things resonate with diff people. Who are you to dictate to a suffering person what to believe if they find some degree of solace in his philosophy, especially as it isn't necessarily outside the realm of jewish belief. Noone is saying not to look inward and see what can be improved. It's about how to make a sense of and deal with serious tradegy. His work was obviously very well received and helped a lot of people better deal with loss.

Anonymous said...

*tragedy

Garnel Ironheart said...

A big mistake all these folks make is blaming God when they should be looking at themselves. Did a child get cancer? Did God cause it or did the chemical plant a few blocks away quietly dumping toxic waste into the water system and creating a high cancer risk?

Anonymous said...

moshe rabbeinu asked hashem this question of tzadik vra lo...anyone who learns mesechtes brachos knows this. there is actually a big machlokes in the rishonim, between the rambam, the ramban, the ralbag, as well as in the great achronim, such as the chasam sofer and the chazon ish, as to what levels and roles hashgachah pratis and hishtadlus play in a persons life. there is also the ramchals famous approach to the supposed power of evil vis a vis G-D's inherent good...(discussed by the satmar rebbe ztzl in vayoel moshe...) there is no apikorsis or kefirah involved. there are countless gemaras and chazals and hundreds of rabbinaical discussions over jewish history that discuss these questions...

Anonymous said...

Easy to have these ‘halachic / holy’ and self-righteous opinions until it happens to you or someone in your family. No-one knows what’s round the corner.