Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Deb Tambor's Private Funeral,buried without any friends

Deb Tambor as a Chassidic wife on the left, and when she left

The boyfriend and 40 additional former ultra-Orthodox friends of an ex-Hasidic woman, who is believed to have committed suicide after being denied access to her children by the Skver Hasidic community, claim they were harassed and given repeated erroneous reports regarding her funeral arrangements after they showed up in New Square to pay their final respects. 

FORWARD.com  reports that Deb Tambor is believed to have committed suicide on September 27 at the home of her boyfriend Abe Weiss in Bridgeton, NJ as a result of her depression that began after she left New Square’s Skver Hasidic community. 

Tambor left the sect four years ago after divorcing her husband and being disavowed by her family for claiming she was sexually molested as a child by a member of the tight knit community. Recognizing her depression, Tambor sought psychiatric help, after which her family actively conspired with community members to prevent her from having contact with her young children. 

Tambor’s boyfriend, Abe Weiss, said, “Her depression started when she decided to leave the community and was threatened with losing her kids. Her biggest issue was that no one cared for her, everyone blew off all her issues.”

 Weiss and the 40 other ex-Hasidic members arrived in New Square around 4 p.m. Sunday for Tambor’s scheduled funeral at the New Square funeral home located in a cul-de-sac at the bottom of Roosevelt Avenue. Weiss and friends reported that within minutes of their arrival a Skver Hasid would slowly drive past them every few minutes. Weiss said that once they arrived, contacts inside the Skver community began texting them conflicting stories about when Tambor’s funeral would begin.

 First it was an hour, then “before dark”, after night fell, then at “midnight.” At around 9 p.m. an uncle of Tambor’s came and told the group he would “have them all handcuffed,” shortly after which police arrived, and after accessing the situation, told Weiss and friends they were welcome to stay and had a right to be there. 

Finally, at 4 a.m., Weiss and friends formed a circle in front of the funeral home and lit candles and had a moment of silence before dispersing. 

Within minutes of leaving Weiss was contacted by one of Tambor’s brothers via text who offered to take him to view Tambor’s body. Weiss was transported by two brothers to remote street outside New Square’s town line where a minivan containing Tambor’s coffin sat parked. Weiss was not allowed to lift the coffin’s lid or view Tambor’s face.

 At 10 a.m the following morning the same brother texted Weiss, telling him that his sister’s funeral was taking place at that very moment in a West Babylon, Long Island cemetery. Weiss said, “It was nice what they did. It would have been nicer if they’d let me come the funeral.” 

New Square community members say Tambor’s family chose to have her buried elsewhere due to the shame she had brought on her family and the community. “Who wants to be buried next to this lady? said Menashe Lustig, a New Square resident. “It’s very difficult to know where to put her. I hear they called up the rabbinic in Israel and they told them the decision that she be burred elsewhere. The family is ashamed. They’re very ashamed.”

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