Sorry Isn’t Enough: The Frum Community’s Troubling Response to Tragedy
In recent days, I’ve been stunned by the reaction of segments of the frum community to an avoidable tragedy. Instead of sober reflection, we’ve witnessed misplaced sympathy and even public support for a man who chose to drink, drive, and kill.
Consider the case of Mordechai Berkowitz, 23 years old — an adult by both secular and halachic standards. He made a conscious decision to get behind the wheel intoxicated. The result was the death of an innocent mother of children.
This was not a case of shogeg. It was karov le‑mezid.
Yet, rather than confronting the gravity of his actions, some in the community rallied behind him.
The author of a popular WhatsApp group, whom I highly respect, even attended his trial to show support. Tehillim groups were organized at holy sites. Would those supporters at his trial have shown up in court, had he killed someone's wife, husband or child of our community?
Have we lost our collective sense of moral clarity?
They made this רוצח into a hero!
I am not calling him a רוצח, our תורה הקדושה calls him that! Now anyone drinking will drive thinking, "worst comes to worst, I'll be made into a hero, and get a great קבלת פנים!
The problem runs deeper than just one case. Too many in this generation — including Torah leaders — have embraced the dangerous notion that saying “sorry” erases consequences. But it doesn’t. A life was taken. A choice was made. Time must be served..
This isn’t a child. This is an adult. Sorry doesn’t always cut it. Consequences matter.
And let’s be honest: if the victim had been a Jewish mother, would the same sympathy have been extended to the driver? History suggests otherwise. When a drunk driver killed an engaged couple on Motzaei Shabbos a few years ago, the community demanded a stiff sentence. Why the double standard?
This hypocrisy is not new. Satmar ass'kanim secured the release of Philip Drelich, who murdered his pregnant wife and a diamond dealer, despite being sentenced to two consecutive life terms, he walked free in 2016. What message does that send?
Meanwhile, the same voices that defend killers are often the loudest critics of Zionists — Jews who built a home for over 7.5 million people and who daily risk their lives for Klal Yisrael. The contrast is staggering.
I believe in rachmonis. Compassion is a cornerstone of our faith. But compassion must never be confused with excusing deliberate, destructive choices. Supporting someone who was karov le‑mezid undermines justice, morality, and the very values we claim to uphold.
The frum community must ask itself: what are we teaching our children? That “sorry” is a get‑out‑of‑jail card? That murder can be overlooked if the perpetrator is one of us? If so, we are not only failing the victims — we are failing ourselves.
Sorry is only good בין אדם למקום
An Orthodox Jewish man who launched an anti–drunk driving campaign after killing a woman in a 2022 crash was sentenced Wednesday to six years in New Jersey State Prison without parole.
Mordechai Berkowitz, 23, admitted he had been drinking before veering across the center line on South Lake Drive on July 22, 2022, fatally striking 44-year-old Juana Lopez-Hernandez.
After the crash, Berkowitz started a “Don’t Drink + Drive” campaign that drew nearly 45,000 pledges. Berkowitz was taken into custody immediately after sentencing and will receive credit for time served.
14 comments:
If the victim was jewish, then it depends.
How jewish was the victim?
Sfardi? Who cares
Satmar? Throw the driver under the bus, unless of course he pays off ra-bonim
Lives in lakewood? Give a Few dollars to BMG and get a yom tefilah
Definitely if the driver was a satmar he would've gotten off with no jail and the victim's family would have to pay him damages for wrecking his car
This is led by "Hasidim", like Moshe Margaretten, the shtreimel wearing Skvira/Square Hasid, and the Chabad-Lubavitch Aleph institute. The Habad preach against prison. This is not normative Orthodoxy, this is Hasidic sects.
What a stupid and sick comment. What is the point of putting someone in jail when he commits a crime?
I can think of a few:
1. Keep that person away from society so he won't commit more crimes.
2. Set an example for others who might think of doing the same thing.
3. While suffering in jail, he may make a conscious decision to become a better person upon release, especially since he doesn't want to go to jail again.
Now, let's see what happened here. A boy drank too much at a Friday afternoon Toameha - an unfortunate practice in the community. He realizes it's very close to Shabbos and he needs to get to his lodgings, so he takes of at high speed. The road is an extremely windy one, and it's very difficult to speed without going off the road. He thought he's in control of the car, but coupled with speeding on a windy road and the effects of his drinking, he crashed and unfortunately, an innocent woman was killed and another seriously injured. He could have expressed remorse and moved on, suffering his fate in jail. But no, he didn't do that. He embarked on a large national campaign, putting his name and face on it despite the tremendous embarrassment to himself and his family, to show others how terrible it is to drink and drive and ensure such an accident will never happen again. Over 40,000 people signed on to the initiative, and it will undoubtedly prevent other accident in the future. So tell me, you sick and heartless man, which one of the reasons above warrant time in prison? He's obviously a changed man, and he set an example - for the good - for others. He has already spent years in house arrest away from society. Wanna suspend his license, send him to courses, fine him? Perhaps. But 6 years in jail with hardened criminals?! What would that do to him?
How many years in prison is DIN demanding for these IDF officers?
Yeshiva bochurim, consider this as peiros of giyus:
*Several intelligence officers were disciplined after Sgt. Yosef Haim Tzvi Serlin, 19, collapsed and died during a Krav Maga training drill with Unit 504 on March 26 at a base in northern Israel. An investigation found that the exercise deviated from official guidelines and protocols set by senior IDF command.*
As a result, the unit commander received a formal censure, another senior officer was barred from promotion for six years, and two captains were removed from their posts, with one dismissed from the military entirely and the other restricted from commanding troops for two years. The case is also under review by the Military Police, whose findings will be forwarded to the Military Advocate General
I noticed yesterday that some rabbi named sorotzkin was standing by him. No idea who he is or how fat his payos are, but how can anyone respect people like this? Seems like in lakewood, anyone who calls himself rabbi thinks everyone must kowtow to them. And the people are stupid enough to do it.
If they could rally around Mondrowitz and Leifler, this guy is small potatoes.
Given that this punk ass, sheltered moron started a "fundraising" campaign disguised as an anti-drunk driving initiative shows his immaturity. Before he serves his punishment (time in prison) he seems to be trying to gain sympathy to delay or shorten the said punishment. Let him sit there and think about the tragic consequences of his irresponsible actions.
He should be the poster boy in every yeshiva so others understand there are ramifications for stupidity.
Get your facts straight Charedi despising Modern Ortho Garnel-Dodo. There were no rallies around those pervs Monstrowitz & Leifer. They did have quiet cover ups orchestrated on their behalfs by the leadership of the Gur group only which is not nearly the same thing. In fact, the most Right Wing entities & personalities were fighting against Monstrowitz. The Edah Chareidis even signed a letter that he is halachically a murderer. Monstrowitz’s only reprieve after he had to flee from impending NYPD arrest was to get a job with Touro in Israel - owned by Modern Orthodox Dr. Rabbiner Bernie Lander - who only terminated Monstrowitz when Charedi rabbis gave heck to & pressured Touro. I was privately shown one of those letters by an American Charedi rabbi
6:28
Rallying around a man who murdered an innocent mother of children is sick, and it's time to change that!
You don't know that he is a "changed man" he started his program so that the Judge give him a lighter sentence, even a blind man can see that! Thank God the Judge saw through this charade!
this was not an accident in the classic sense this as I said before is קרוב למזיד
You scribble:
"Over 40,000 people signed on to the initiative."
This in itself is sick and perverted! Only a drei-kup will come up with this twisted logic!
I didn't sign this on to this "initiative" and I won't drink and drive.
We need an "initiative" NOT to drink and drive, we need 40,000 signatures for this?
How about we get 40,000 signatures to to murder someone, will that also be a Kiddush Hashem?
Why don't you ask the daughter of this murdered lady if 6 years is enough?
What if this lady were your own close relative, how many years would you say should he sit them???HMMMMMM??
This crap to rally around a רוצח must stop ASAP!
6:36
Your comparison to this story is insane! And shows the total disconnect between the Yeshivishe naive sheep and reality!
No one is making these officers into "Heros"
No one is running to the Kosel or to the Ribnitzer to daven for them !
This case is not done yet if you had bothered to read your own post!
9:34
Your entire comment is incoherent!
Just to answer one of your bizarre statements, there were in fact rallies for the fat sexual pervert Leifer!
I don't believe for one second that the Eida Haganavim wrote a letter stating that Monderer "is halachically a murderer."
I just saw that pervert walking in Machna Yehuda last Friday, talking to bunch of Gerer Guys with their pants in their socks, I don't think they isolated at all!
I am honestly not aware of any rallies for the fat katchka beyond a few relatives trying to intimidate victims outside the courtroom. If there were any actual rallies I stand corrected. The stuffed hoizen guys are still friendly because of the orders from high up in Gur only which was part of my original point. The Edah poskening azoy on Mondrowitz was in addition to another kol korei from Brooklyn rabbonim. I’m looking if I can still find them online. For the record there is news breaking now that Levi Aron dropped dead in prison who AM NY newspaper had reported there was a sexual angle in his snuffing out the neshomo of poor little Leiby ah
The chevra like Ben Hirsch & Eric Aiken who are the type to display kol korays against molesters have sadly taken down their websites. There is no question that the Edah took a major stand against Mondrowitz. I saw the retzicha tzettel many times & discussed it with people many times. Bear in mind it was a long time ago before the crazy Sikrikim hijacked the Edah. It would indeed be illogical for today's Edah to put out such a psak
What is the problem? while "charadim" learn nizikin in yeshivas of course that is not for actually doing, only theoretical (and looking for loopholes) when it comes to halacha we skip choshen mishpat because lo signov and even more lo sirtzach have nothing to do with charadisim. Next thing is your are going to say we should care about hilchos avodah zara. What religion are you trying to preach?
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