This nurse is 100% correct ..... the proof is in the pudding as more and more young couples are getting divorced in the first year of marriage....
Parents pressured, perhaps worried that their "old katchke" daughter who is already 21 will never get married in our frum world, push their child to get married ASAP.
In the Yeshivishe World the boys are in the driver seats, only G-d knows why; they get lists and lists of resumes, the mothers of these "fancy glasses, pleated pants, Barcelino hats (now small rimmed), spoiled brats, demand that the girl have a profession, be "chinush" slim to the point of being anorexic. These guys even if they are 28, grab the naive wild-eyed 18 year-old fresh out of seminary, leaving the more mature, smarter 24 -28 year accomplished girls in the dust bin... The reason is because the boys are immature, have low self esteem because in their hearts of hearts they know that they don't compare in maturity and in education to any girl their age.
Most boys that come out of the Yeshiva System and I'm including Mir Yerushalyim, Brisk or Lakewood are bono-fide ama-ratzim.
There I said it...
Just yesterday in the shul that I daven, they asked a "Brisker" single boy to say something on the parsha (Mattos /Massah), during the 10 minute break between mincha & maariv.... he hemmed and hawed for the first 3 minutes, scratching his head searching the shelves for a non-existent sefer, and then when we asked him to say anything that he learned that very day ..he gave us a blank stare..... this particular boy ... the sweetest and the most handsome guy and the best "catch" in the neighborhood will probably demand that the girl parents buy him an apartment and support him for the first 52 years of marriage..
Just to put this in perspective ... when we ask any working guy to say anything on the parsha on the 10 minute break ...even on a whim, they will come up with a beautiful vort that is relevant to the times....
Just two weeks ago on Shabbos Parshas Balak, a "kollel guy" gave a half hour pilpul on a sugye in Yavomos, which I guess he was learning, to an audience that were "Yodea sefer" but no one could decipher it and like an airplane that lost its landing gear he couldn't land ..... as far as I'm concerned he wasted my time and I consider this "bitul Torah"and I'm wondering "how will I ever get that half hour back." Mind you that in this parsha even a donkey talked.
The shul advertised this "Shmooze to Nowhere," weeks before.
This guy has been in kolel for 13 years and is being supported by his wife who also takes care of a home with 7 children.
The girls are far better educated, they are knowledgeable in Tanach with all the relevant commentaries, they have more than a basic understanding in Shulchan Aruch ... and know how to cook and bake and are all around accomplished . In addition, they have profession that will support their ama-ratzim husbands.
There is something very wrong with our education of our boys when they know how to give "chaburois" but don't have a clue what Rashi wants in any given pasuk in the Torah, nor do they know or care to know Tanach.... most of them are very machmir in their lifestyles but are ignorant in basic halachos..
It's no wonder that the Gedoilim today are all close to 100 years old, because the Yeshivas are not producing any Talmedei Chachamim, just mass producing like a Ford Auto Plant, right-wing fanatics that cannot wait for the Zionists to arrest one of them so they can run out to the streets and block traffic.
As of this writing there isn't a Gadol in the entire world that is less than 75 years old .... I remember growing up when Gedoilim were in their 30 and 40's .... those were from an era where most talmidim got a very rounded education which included secular studies..
I know that I didn't even get to address the letter yet..
But I don't have an answer to the nurse that wrote to Flatbush Girl...she has a lot of company in a frum world gone mad!
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