Agudath Israel & Touro College Announce Certificate Program in Pro-Frum Propaganda (PFP) (SATIRE)
Chasdei Hashem, the heimish community has outgrown its small stable of spokespeople who defend us from Amalek, Misyanevim, OTD Shkotzim, liberal anti-Semites, and misguided regulators. Shebchol dor, omdim aleiynu... v'hakodosh baruch matzileinu.
But we also have to do our hishtadlus. That is where the PFP program comes in. It will train a whole new generation who will answer the call.
Requirements: Solid English language skills and Internet skills (and a heter to use unfiltered Internet for hatzalah work)
Curriculum:
Use of the terms, orthodox, ultraorthodox, Hareidi, and frum
How to hand definitional arguments about: religious, accused, convicted, on-appeal, orthodox, rabbi, crime, child endangerment, illiteracy, Herpes, anti-vax, etc.
How to hand definitional arguments about: religious, accused, convicted, on-appeal, orthodox, rabbi, crime, child endangerment, illiteracy, Herpes, anti-vax, etc.
How to show the others are worse
How to nitpick their facts and present ours
How to conduct an ad hominem attack on an individual, a media outlet, or the entire sensible world
Who gets to decide what is antisemitic
How to find our experts to quote
How to locate BT's to demonstrate our professional developments and coolness
Mastering the cliches about our wonderful families and communities
Using Kugel, cholent etc to carbo load and dull our skeptics
Instructors:
Avi Shafran, Jonathan Rosenblum, Nathan Levine, Dovid Zweibel, Yaakov Menken, Yossi Gestetner, the team that turned Rubashkin into a Tzadik, and our latest phenom:
Avi Shafran, Jonathan Rosenblum, Nathan Levine, Dovid Zweibel, Yaakov Menken, Yossi Gestetner, the team that turned Rubashkin into a Tzadik, and our latest phenom:
Adina Sash/@Flatbush Girl.
Employment post graduation all but guaranteed since many of our leaders called upon by media need speechwriters who have decent English.
Happy Purim
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